


Love, Life And Death

by KassandraScarlett



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: Character Death, F/M, Heavy Angst, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-25
Updated: 2019-03-25
Packaged: 2019-12-07 11:26:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18234236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KassandraScarlett/pseuds/KassandraScarlett
Summary: A birthday party is time for celebration. But an accident changes everything. This is the story of how the greatest love two teenagers have ever know in shredded into pieces.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Cross-posted on Fanfiction.net

**2nd June, 2005- EPOV**

  I couldn't wait for the guests to arrive, especially _her_. _Bella_. My best friend. The one I've been in love with since we first met in freshman year of high school. She doesn't know of course. I only ever told her brother, Jasper, and my sister, Rosalie.

  "Happy birthday, dear brother," Rosalie laughed, walking into the room, her blonde hair swinging behind her.

  "Thanks, Rose," I smiled. She sat down next to me on the bed.

  "So are you planning on telling Bella about your not-so-little crush on her?" She asked playfully.

  I blushed slightly. "It's not a crush, Rose. I'm in love with her. And yes, I'm going to tell her today." As I finished speaking, my phone rang. I smiled when I saw the caller ID. "Hey, Bella."

  " _Hey birthday-boy_ ," she laughed and my heart swelled at the sound.

  Rosalie stared at me, with a knowing smile, then mouthed, " _Ali and Em should be here soon_ ," and went downstairs.

  " _Jaz and I are starting out now. We should reach your house in about thirty minutes_ ," Bella estimated.

  "Okay, see you then."

  Just as I put the phone down, I heard a high-pitched voice calling my name from the living room. "Edward Cullen, where are you?"

  "Right here, pixie," I called out as I bounded down the stairs. Alice squealed and jumped into my arms, while her brother clapped me on the back.

  We had all been taken by surprise when we realised that Alice and Emmett McCarthy were related. Emmett was huge, tall with rippling muscles, while Alice was a tiny thing. But they both shared the same short black hair, sparkling blue eyes and an endless supply of never-ending enthusiasm.

  I winked at Rosalie as she blushed when Emmett pecked her on the cheek. They'd been dating for two years now, but he was still the only one who could make her blush.

  "When are the Whitlocks getting here?" Alice asked pseudo-innocently. I smirked at her. It was no secret that she had the hots for Bella's twin. She was always squealing about Jasper's " _sandy-brown hair, chocolate brown eyes, he's just gorgeous."_

  "Oh stop smirking," she snapped at me. "It's not like you're any better about Bella." That shut me up. Alice was the one smirking now, as were Emmett and Rosalie.

  "What do you mean?" I stammered. I was pretty sure Rose wouldn't tell on me like that.

  Alice rolled her eyes. "Seriously, we're not blind. And you are pretty obvious. It's actually a miracle Bella hasn't picked up on it yet."

  "Though if she did," Rose chimed in, "You'd be quite surprised."

  "What do you mean?" I asked again.

  Emmett snickered. "Oh let's just say our Jelly Belly has some secrets of her own." Before I could ask the same question a third time, Alice suggested we wait for our missing set of friends out on the porch.

  While we did, I couldn't help but feel nervous that Bella might not feel the same towards me. If she didn't, would I be able to handle her rejection? I didn't think so, but hopefully I could still have her friendship.

  "Edward, did you get a call from either twin about when they're arriving here?" Emmett asked with a frown.

  "Yeah, Bella called to tell me they would be here within the half hour," I replied and checked my watch. I got a sinking feeling in my stomach when I saw that it had been forty minutes since Bella called.

  "Something's wrong," Alice murmured. All of us rounded on her at once.

  "What do you mean?" Emmett asked, fear prominent in his voice. "I mean," she whispered, "I have this feeling that something bad is going to happen."

  Emmett, Rosalie and I glanced at each other nervously. Over the last two years, we'd all learned to trust Alice's ' _feelings_ ', as they usually turned out to be on the spot. Rose met my eyes, her light green eyes swimming with fear and concern.

  I could almost read her mind: _'Nothing can happen to them, they'll be fine, they'll both be just fine'._ I could only hope she was right _._

  No sooner than I thought that, my phone rang. My stomach lurched when I saw the caller ID belonged to my father. Why was he calling? He was supposed to be at the hospital. With shaking hands, I answered the call, everyone's eyes trained on me.

  "Hey dad," I tried to sound like everything was just fine.

  "Son, I need you to bring your sister and your friends over to the hospital now." He sounded tired and miserable, like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders.

  "Why? Is everything alright?" I asked, already fearing the worst. There was a brief silence on the other end.

  Then, "The Whitlock twins have been in an accident. I think you should all be here." The line went dead and I took a deep breath to steady my spinning head.

  "Is everything okay?" Alice asked quietly.

  I grabbed my car keys and hopped in to the driver's seat. I didn't answer Alice until we were all seated and on the way to the hospital. "Jasper and Bella were in an accident. Carlisle wants us there." Rose and Alice both gave audible gasps.

  Soon, Emmett and I were pacing in front of the operation theatre, waiting for my father to come out and give us the verdict. Renée Whitlock was quietly weeping in a corner, my sister and Alice sitting with her, both in complete shock.

    After what seemed like ages, Dr. Carlisle Cullen stepped out, his face worn and aged. Rosalie and Alice came to stand beside me and Emmett. Carlisle took a deep breath and ran a hand through his blond hair. "They were hit by a drunk driver . It was a hit-and-run case," he spoke softly.

  None of us said a word, until Renée stood and, with a trembling voice, asked, "What about my children?" Carlisle looked at her and took another shaky breath.

  "Jasper will remain paraplegic for a few months. He'll regain the use of his legs, but he'll have a slight limp for life." Renée nodded, slightly calm and appeased. Alice and Rosalie both sighed in obvious relief. But I knew better than to celebrate yet. Still, I couldn't ask the words.

  Luckily, Emmett took the matter out of my hands. "What about Bella?" His voice was a quiet whisper.

  All of us looked at my father expectantly. He swallowed. "She had been at the wheel. She suffered from several injuries: two cracked ribs, a broken leg and a severe head wound." He paused briefly and shut his eyes, while I tried to ignore his repeated use of the past tense.

  When he opened his eyes again, I somehow knew. The whole world went into slow motion as Carlisle spoke the next words. "She's dead. We couldn't save her. I'm sorry."

  Renée staggered backwards, flopping down on the bench. Alice and Rose both gave soft screams of despair and began crying earnestly. Emmett was in total shock, muttering, "No, she can't be dead. She can't be. Not my sister. Not my Bells." While I simply closed my eyes and cried silently for the loss of the only love I would ever know.

 

* * *

 

 

  The funeral was, ironically, beautiful; full of lavender and white freesia. Bella's favourite flowers. While the funeral priest spoke about Bella, Alice and Rosalie wept openly. Emmett had one arm around each of them, offering support to both of them. But silent tears streamed down his own face, as he mourned the girl he'd seen as his second sister.

   Jasper was beside me on his wheelchair, his face set in stone, mirroring mine, reflecting nothing but shock and denial. Neither of us could quite accept the death of the one who'd meant the world to us.

  After the funeral was over, and everyone had left, the five of us found ourselves standing in front of the marble tombstone, gazing at the words inscribed on it: _Here lies Isabella Whitlock, an angel in disguise, a true friend to all those in need._ Finally, Alice sighed and leaned into her brother's embrace. "I want to go home," she whimpered. Silently, Emmett placed an arm around her and began leading her towards their car.

  Rose laid a gentle hand on my shoulder. "I'll get Em to take me home. You drop Jas, then you come straight home, okay?" I nodded absently and she followed the McCarthy's, leaving me alone with Jasper. For a long while, we stood in silence. "Do you blame me?" Jasper asked, his voice soft and defeated. I frowned, not taking my eyes off the engravings.

  Jasper was a very charismatic person. He had the most uncanny ability of knowing exactly what the other person was feeling and even calming them. But now he was asking me? I thought about his question and found I couldn't give him an answer without lying or hurting him. Finally, I worked out a response. "It's not your fault. But a part of me is jealous of Alice because, she gets to see you everyday and think of how lucky she is it wasn't you." I knew Jasper appreciated honesty, so I gave it to him.

  True enough, I saw him nod in my peripheral vision. "I'm jealous of you and Emmett," he admitted quietly. I frowned again, not able to see his reasoning. "Because, you get to see your sisters everyday," he went on. "And think of how lucky you are, to still have them." I lowered my eyes, not wanting him to see the sudden tears pooling in them.

  "She'd written a letter before we started from the house. It was for you," he stated and handed me an envelope from his jacket pocket. I took it with trembling fingers and finally risked a glance at my friend. It wasn't just his brown hair and brown eyes that matched Bella's; they both had the same pointed chins, stubborn jaws and perfectly arched eyebrows. I felt a pang in my chest and realized I would never be able to look at him again without cringing.

  "And just so you know," he began, suddenly stammering. "I blame myself." And tears finally fell from his eyes.

 

 

* * *

 

 

  After dropping Jas home, I sat in my room, silently contemplating the enclosed letter. Bella had written this. She had actually handwritten this before the accident. With trembling fingers, I unfolded the letter and began reading.

_Dear Edward,_ it read. I made my way down the letter, the knives in my chest twisting, the horrible pain cutting through me.

_With all my love,_

_Bella,_ I finished.

  The letter fluttered from my hand and a shrill wail filled my ears. The door of my room burst open and my sister came in to sit by me. I could see her lips moving; she was saying something to me. But the repeated cries of pain deafened me. I tried to tell her to say it again, but the noise stopped. It was then that I realised I was the making the awful sound.

  As the revelation struck me, the events of the past three days hit me with blinding force and I finally let myself break down in tears in my sister's arms.


	2. Chapter 2

**2nd June, 2008- EPOV**

_The sun was out, a rare occurrence in Forks. We were making the most of it by spending the day in the meadow. I turned my head to face the angel lying beside me. The beauty of our surroundings paled in comparison to her pale perfection._

_As if sensing my intense gaze, she looked over at me, her pink lips breaking out in a shy smile. "What is it?" She asked, a red blush staining her cheeks. "Oh nothing," I answered carelessly. "Just admiring the most beautiful girl I know." The blush, that we all teased her about, grew even darker._

_I chuckled and held out an arm towards her. Immediately, she rolled over to lay on top of me, her elbows resting on my shoulder, my one arm wrapped around her waist, the other hand cupping her face. Her dark hair fell on either side of our faces, creating a dark curtain between us and the rest of the world._

_Slowly, she leaned down and kissed my lips. Her fingers played with the hair just above my ears and I tightened my hold on her, the strawberry scent of her shampoo overwhelming. Her lips tasted of chocolate and orange juice, and I relished it on her._

_All too soon, we broke apart, breathing heavily. I opened my eyes to look at her. She looked back at me through her lashes. "I love you," she whispered. I brushed a thumb across her cheek and opened my mouth to return the sentiment..._

 

* * *

 

  I jolted upright in bed, panting, tears trickling down my face. I quickly wiped my face and thought wryly, _'Happy birthday to me.'_ I swung my legs of the bed and sat on the edge, my head buried in my hands, trying to regain some semblance of composure. I couldn't.

  For the last three years, my life had been just a series of monotonous events, lived day after day, trying to preserve a facade for the sake of my family and friends. Unfortunately, the slightest gesture of love or intimacy made me being horribly. My parents and Rosalie and Emmett tried their best to avoid even touching each other in front of me. So did Alice and Jasper, but with them, all they had to do was look directly at each other and you would feel the love and utter devotion radiating from both.

  After the accident, Jasper had finally come to his senses and given in to his feelings for Alice. Now, they were inseparable. I was happy for them, really. But, somewhere deep inside, I resented and was jealous of their relationship. I couldn't even look him in the eye without fearing he would see those hidden feelings, not to mention the fact, he was the spitting image of his sister.

  With a sigh, I walked over to the dressing table. There were no photos of her in my room, or anywhere in the whole house really. It hurt too much to even think her name, let alone see a picture of her. Instead, the letter Jasper had given to me three years ago, was still there, worn and crinkled from the many times I had unfolded and folded it again. I resisted the urge to do so now; I had it memorized and there was no point in torturing myself.

  Instead, I forced myself to look at my reflection and cringed again. I was a pitiful sight. Even a stranger could tell I was suffering. I kept staring at myself, not able to make myself move and get dressed for college. I was already late. But something was different today. I felt a tingling presence all over my skin, something I hadn't felt in a long time. It was the feeling I'd had very time she was nearby.

  I would never know if what happened next was real or just a figment of my long-dead imagination and constant suffering.

  The image in the mirror changed. Unkempt bronze hair became dark, mahogany curls; sunken, dark green eyes became bright, chocolate orbs; the weary figure of a man with a broken heart became the slender, straight body of a girl in the prime of her life. I was staring at the image of a girl I knew to be dead. "Bella," I whispered and reached out to touch the mirror. To touch _her face_.

  She didn't say anything, just smiled at me; the same smile that had haunted my dreams every night. Before I could say anything else, the image disappeared and I found myself facing my own reflection again. But now, I knew what to do. Nobody was at home. Nobody could stop me.

  Moving fast, I stepped into the bathroom and, plugging the drain, began filling the tub. Opening the cupboards, I found the sleeping pills I needed and took out four of them, popping them all into my mouth at once. Going back into my room to grab a marker, I wrote a short message on the bathroom mirror. I could feel the drugs taking effect. I stepped into the tub and relaxed, letting the movement of the water lull me into sleep.

  Before I closed my eyes, I could have sworn I heard a melodic voice speaking to me, "I'll be waiting."

* * *

**3rd Person POV**

  Alice, Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie sat together in Emmett's Jeep, in front of the college gates, waiting for Edward to arrive. They weren't really expecting him for another fifteen minutes. After all, it was hard enough for them to live through _today_ , one could only imagine how difficult it was for Edward.

  Without warning, Alice gasped loudly in the backseat, clutching Rosalie's arm. Jasper and Emmett twisted in their seats upfront to face her, while Rose shook her slightly. "Alice, you okay?" She asked. Alice's eyes were dazed. "We have to get back. Something's wrong. Edward…" She trailed off, not able to say anything else.

  She didn't need to; Emmett was already starting the car. The six of them had known each other since the first day of high school. Their numbers were already down to five; they didn't want to lose anyone else.

  Five minutes later, they were ringing the bell to the Cullen's house. Carlisle and Esme were out of town for the week and Rose practically lived with Emmett, so Edward had the house to himself. But when he didn't answer the door, Rose used her key and all four of them barged in. "Edward!" They called him one after the other. Alice went to check upstairs, Rosalie went to the garden behind the house, Emmett and Jasper checked the rooms below.

  Suddenly, a shrill scream sounded from upstairs. Rose, Jasper and Emmett raced after Alice, finding her in the doorway of the bathroom. All four of them stood frozen at scene that greeted them. Edward's lifeless body was in the bathtub, which was filled with water. There was a bottle of sleeping pills near the basin and a simple message of three words had been scrawled on the mirror in black marker: _Not without her_.


	3. Chapter 3

**3rd Person POV**

  Alice stood next to Jasper, her head on his shoulder, his arm around her waist. Beside them, Rosalie and Emmett stood in the same position. All of them were staring at the two tombstones beside each other, one of which had been there for three years, the other which had been placed only recently. The funeral had been over a few minutes ago, but the four friends couldn't find it in themselves to leave two of their group behind.

  "Do you think she ever knew?" Alice asked. "How much he loved her?" Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett shook their heads. They all wished the two lovers had had a chance to be together, before fate intervened. "Do you think _he_ knew, or even suspected, that she loved him?" Alice asked again.

  Once more, Rosalie and Emmett shook their heads, but Jasper said firmly, "He knew."

  The three others frowned at him in confusion. Jasper pulled out a crumpled piece of paper from his pocket and smoothed it out. "Bella had written this the day of the accident, just before we left for the party. I hadn't read it, but I gave it to Edward since it was addressed to him." He paused, then took a deep breath before continuing. "I found it on Edward's bedside table today morning. Do you want me to read it aloud?"

  Every one nodded their assent. "I think we have the right to know; they were our best friends. As close as siblings," Emmett pointed out. Jasper agreed silently, though he didn't say anything and began to read.

_Dear Edward,_

_First off, happy birthday. Yes, I know I've already wished you, but, who's counting?_

_Anyway, the reason I'm writing this to you, is that if I try to tell you verbally, I'll start babbling like I do when I'm nervous and I'll end up making a fool of myself. Emmett would tease me endlessly about it; you know how he gets. I'd never be able to live it down._

_And now I'm babbling on paper. Sorry. I think I should just cut to the chase, Right. The thing is, I'm in love with you, Edward Cullen._

_Don't freak out, please. I know this seems kind of sudden and out of the blue, but it really isn't. Remember, the Christmas Ball in our sophomore year? You offered to be my date, just so Mike, Taylor and all the other boys would stop pestering me. I think that's when I fell for you._

_The reason I took so long to tell you is: I was afraid of your rejection. But when I started paying more attention to you, I realized that you paid a lot more attention to me than to anyone else. I realized that what I'd seen as just helping out a friend on your part was actually something entirely different. And I thought that maybe I did have a chance. So…_

_Please, as soon as you read this letter, talk to me._

_With all my love,_

_Bella._

  For some time, there was silence. Then Rosalie sighed. "Well, he knew," she said.

  "And she at least suspected," Emmett finished.

  "I guess we'll just have to be content with that much," Jasper added.

  Alice agreed. "Wherever they are now, they're together. That's enough."

  With a last glance, the four of them left the cemetery, praying that their lost friends were happy.

**Author's Note:**

> My Tumblr: bad-days-and-beautiful-nights


End file.
